t thing for a religious person to do because the divine by definition is the most important the most profound highest concept definitionally and and allowing the death of god and to discover the god beyond god as a phrase that you're um using is is a terrifying experience um and they're definitely i think that there definitely was a death and rebirth and i don't want to make it sound as if as if i've discovered it and i've made it and i'm now here at the top of the mountain no no no no no no lord like everyone else but it's a journey and it's a beautiful journey so to me maybe that answers your question a little no i think that was great um and i like the way you uh you invoke the true the good and the beautiful and the fact that uh not only are they being uh sort of separately revivified for you i get a sense that they were also there their potential integration and reunification was being revivified for you like you were like it could be i mean people have experiences where the true becomes more important to them or the beautiful or the good or perhaps even all three but it sounds like it wasn't just all three it was it was like like almost a neoplatonic right there just three different aspects of the same thing is that a fair is that a fair description yeah i think that's actually very accurately and beautifully put and i think perhaps earlier my journey when because i was transitioning from trying to find truth it may have been a truth factor which was more salient but i think as my journey has progressed and matured it's definitely become the fact that that those three things are are not separate at all then and we began to discuss this last summer i think that the the metaphysic and the ethnic and epistemology of mysticism are one um and there's there's a performative beauty to this theory because i think and and i think this is where we may fruitfully disagree i think there is actually a propositional value that emerges the truth emerges from this and and and at the very bare bones of that it is the the fu